you’ll meet all kinds of people. Some that you might instantly connect with while others you may want to know better before the first date.
However, in any courtship it’s always good to remember that you are simply dating & nothing is set in stone until both individuals agree to be committed to one another.
We've all been in situations where you go on a wonderful first date that is quickly followed by a second which could not have come sooner! And when it does, it's a perfect evening where you're enjoying dinner, wine and great conversation. You're thinking, “Wow, this is going really well.” You even get a goodnight kiss on the cheek & are so excited that things are picking up between the two of you.
Only, you don't hear from your date at all. Days pass and there's no phone call or even an email. You're confused and a bit perplexed. You're also a bit worried – “what if something has happened!” That may sound a bit silly – but we assure you – you will think of every conceivable reason to explain why he/she did not call you – except for what appears to be the most obvious one – maybe they’re just not that into you!
For ladies, the rules of dating have wrongfully been cemented. Don't call the guy, don't be too eager. If he's into you, he 'll call you. Let the guy pursue you – that's what keeps them interested…blah blah blah. You’ll probably hear this advice from a friend at one point or another or find it in the “Dear Abby” columns and, if that’s not enough, Greg Behrendt took the time to write an entire book about it!
In his book, Greg says:
“Oh sure, they say they're busy. They say that they didn't have even a moment in their insanely busy day to pick up the phone. It was just that crazy. All lies. With the adven of cell phones and speed dialing, it is almost impossible not to call you. Sometimes I call people from my pants pocket when I don't even mean to. If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you.”
We should perhaps pay heed to this piece of wisdom. But, rules are meant to be broken! We’d like to think that not all men out there can be painted in the broad strokes that Behrendt uses in his book. In any case, when it comes to matters of the heart, we suggest trusting your own instincts than to rely on the advice that Greg Behrendt or Oprah are dishing out.
If he hasn't called you and your instincts are telling you to pick up the phone and make that call – then do it! Surely that's a more constructive approach than simply jumping to conclusions that he is just not interested in you.
Besides, why does it always have to be the guy's job to make the call? Why can't the girl call and say “hey, I really enjoyed our time together and would love to see you again.” So call. Leave him a voicemail – maybe even two. But, if he doesn't return your call after that – then it's safe to conclude that perhaps he's just not that into you after all.
But, at least you've saved yourself all that agonizing sitting around and waiting for a call. You took control of the situation instead of letting the situation control you!
And, that's something to feel great about!